Hello. I is Pig. This is my diary. It's super Top Secret, but Duck and me agrees that you needs to read it so you can help us, because we is in a bit of a pickle. I hopes you will be believing what I has written, because Duck says it is UNBELIEVABLE. But it isn't. It's my life. You will see. Love, P[...]

We love Pig, but Pig loves Farmer. After all, Farmer gives Pig yummy slops and special back scratches, and calls him Sausage and seems to love him more, the fatter he gets. Just as well Pig doesn't speak any Farmer. But Duck does (Duck's clever like that), and he's determined his best friend should [...]